Listen Up, Doctors! Top 10 Complaints From Your Spouses

There are some things we want to tell our DrSpouses that drive us crazy, right?

Is it how they chew loudly? Leave their clothes on the ground? Can’t remember to close the garage?

I made a Top 10 list of them.

Note that I don’t have some sort of special privilege to speak for thousands of medical spouses. I’m only one person, obviously. Also, keep in mind that some things on my list are meant to be serious, others tongue in cheek 😂

If you like this list, share this article with your DrSpouse and friends by pressing on the social media buttons on the bottom!

10 Complaints Doctors Need To Hear From Their Spouses

  1. Love us especially when you’re not with us. Drop compliments to your colleagues about us and the kids. Send text messages or FaceTime us. We know that you can’t be with us all the time, but show us you rather be with us than away from us.
  2. Schedule regular date nights with us. We don’t have to go drink fancy wine in a penthouse downtown, it can be tacos and beer in a hole in a wall that we always enjoyed. Put it on your calendar and gave it an honest shot. We can always reschedule, but we need to make it a priority.
  3. Let’s be open and honest with each other about our dreams — whether that’s travel, adoption, owning a business, taking a sabbatical or retiring early, moving near family, or starting a charity. If we talk about our dreams, they can actually become plans. But if we don’t talk about them, then they stay dreams.
  4.  We want family finances to not be a solo act but a team effort. Let’s have “money dates” on Personal Capital and discuss how much longer we have until we are debt-free.
  5. It’s no surprise that because you have to leave our family to take care of other families, we have to shoulder a ton of work at home. But once you take that for granted and become a slob because you assume we will pick up after you, that’s when you crossed the line. If you can’t make it better for us, then at least don’t make it worse for us.
  6. In the quest to becoming a rockstar physician, don’t lose yourself. We are in love with a person — who just happens to be a doctor. And we know that person has interests outside medicine. Maybe it’s sports, playing music, writing a book, BBQing, or raising livestock. Whatever it is that energizes you, pursue it.
  7. Once you walk through that door into the house, you are a spouse and parent first. If you need to study, chart, or do handoffs, don’t plop your laptop in the middle of the living room and expect everybody to stay quiet and put life on halt for you. Instead, take your laptop and leave for your own quiet place.
  8. As a doctor, you might find it easier to care for patients but harder to recognize when you need to see one yourself. But as your spouse, we KNOW when you need help — sometimes even better than yourself. If we say you need to see your primary care physician, therapist, or other professional, we’re not kidding around. Go see one.
  9. Never lose sight of the real operation and spend quality time with your kids every chance you can. Know what they like, their dreams, talents, and struggles. They are learning so much from you. Your medical career is a calling, but your real legacy and immortality project is your family.
  10. For goodness sake, don’t text us that you’re “coming home” before you’re in the car. We’re tired of the false alarms. It’s only happening once the tires are rolling 😀


Your Turn

If I missed anything you think needs to be on this list, whether it’s serious or funny, please comment below!